The most obvious next step was our wedding. We didn't want to beat around the bush. In hindsight, everything fell into place almost magically and it really took only about 10 days to plan. I mean yes, it was nuts but it all worked out in the end.
D: We told our parents and they were, of course, thrilled! By Indian standards we were both very stale cupcakes and our parents were happy to get us off the shelves. We set the date for November 22, 2009. Originally, it was only meant to be a Justice of Peace ceremony as a bigger wedding was planned for India in the summer of 2010. But of course, these things seldom turn out exactly the way they are planned.
As the announcement was made to family members, we realized that not all of our relatives who live in the US could not make it to India for the bigger wedding. People were willing to travel all the way out to Boston even for the Justice of Peace ceremony. What started out as a little thing with just our parents and ourselves turned into three events- the Mehendi party the evening before, the Arya Samaj wedding in the morning and the Justice of Peace ceremony and Reception in the evening. We ended up having to limit it to family and close friends who live in the Boston area and planned on inviting everyone to the bigger Indian wedding. Things happened so fast... I didn't even get a chance to inform my friends in Connecticut and in other parts of the US. The same thing happened to Rama with his friends and extended family all over the US. We want to take this time to apologize to all of our friends and family who we wished we could have invited to our wedding but couldn't because of unforeseen circumstances. Our bigger Indian wedding/reception never materialized because of visa issues ( we weren't able to leave the US because Rama's travel document didn't arrive until the very last moment thus making it impossible for our parents to plan anything...).
Between a trip that I had planned with my sister to Belize a few months prior to meeting Rama ( mid- late October 2009) , a conference Rama had to attend for work in Tennessee ( early November), and another trip to St. Louis, Missouri that Rama had planned prior to meeting me (mid- November), we really only had a little more than a week to plan everything.
Things came together so smoothly only because we had the complete support of our parents, the rest of our families, and great friends who pitched in wherever they could to make things happen for us. First of all, everything that needed to be brought from India( all the saris, veshtis, the garlands, jewelry, the gifts for family members, and everything needed for the actual ceremony) was totally taken care of by our parents. There was just so much positive energy surrounding our planning- we organized and assigned tasks amongst our friends and kept things as simple as possible.
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| Magnificent sunset on Caye Caulker |
D:
Mid- October 2009 ( 1 month before wedding): I was away in Belize for about 9 days with my darling sister. We had not taken a vacation together in a long time and had been planning this trip for a few months. Rama could not come with us because of visa issues so we both went by ourselves. Its really crazy but did you guys know that with an Indian passport, a visitor's visa to Belize is $280!!! Insane! We had the best time ever- much needed. We stayed mostly on Caye Caulker. We highly recommend Costa Maya Beach Cabanas. For about $40/day we got fantabulous views, a decent sized room, bathroom, kitchenette, and a private deck with access to the beach. It was right across from Frenchie's Diving ( whom we also highly recommend) where both of us got our PADI Open Water Diving Certification. The diving there was incredible! We were actually under water for a lot of our trip so even though it rained quite a bit above water, it didn't really matter to us! Apart from the dives, we did some snorkeling and cave tubing. We got a lot of quality time together which is always important. Of course, I rambled ad nauseam to Shoba about my new found true love and bored her with every little detail of our love story.
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| lounging on our private deck |
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| the diving sisters |
Rama and I were apart for the first time since we got together. We had long romantic conversations over the phone every night ( he later confessed that he spent more than $200 on calling cards ) and he surprised me with flowers delivered by the owner of Costa Maya. He put up this web page to count down the days, hours, minutes, and seconds that we would have to wait till we saw each other again: http://acornpark.home.comcast.net/~acornpark/countdown/PiningAway.html. The timer now of course says zero!
Late October- mid- November 2009: Soon after my return from Belize, Rama had to leave on a conference to Tennessee. I missed him so much!
Our friends, Aruna and KK, graciously offered to host our Arya Samaj ceremony at their home in Acton, MA. They were also crucial in planning several aspects of the wedding. I would work a full day at my job in Connecticut and in the evenings, Aruna and I would stay up late on skype trying to hash out the details of the wedding. As the guest list grew bigger and bigger, we decided that we would move the Justice of Peace ceremony and reception to the Chelmsford Country Club ( which as it turned out happened to be free on the weekend we needed it). Aruna and KK decided that paying for the country club would be their wedding present to us which was totally awesome. There was a large dance floor so we decided on the fly that it would be nice to have a DJ. Aruna and KK knew a DJ and who again was free on the day of the reception. We then added on the photographer and videographer who were also available on such short notice ( like 1 week before!) . It wasn't exactly peak season and we were flexible with our needs so things just fell into place. We decided that we would rent all of the Indian decorations that we would use at both of the ceremonies. Aruna and I went to see Shoba Shastry who does professional wedding decor. She encouraged me to go simple since it was a relatively small party. When Rama got back from his conference, we went down to Shoba Aunty's warehouse and handpicked all the items we would use: everything from golden overlays for the tables to paper mache decorative welcome statues.
The Mehendi Party: We are also extremely grateful to our friends, Prakruthi, Gopal, Tanu, Amisha, Rahul, and Sunny for helping put together different aspects of wedding, including the organization of the Mehendi party on the day before the wedding. Prakruti helped me find a mehendi artist who worked for five hours on my arms and legs to create her masterpiece.
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| Rama had to find his initials that were written somewhere on my palms |
The Mehendi party was held on Saturday, Nov 21, 2009 at the club room of our friends' apartment complex. The venue was cozy enough for a small crowd. We had another Mehendi artist come there as well for all of our guests. Tanu and Gopal organized to have Gujurati food including scrumptious dhlokas that were to die for! We had some fun with people busting out with their hidden singing talents when we did a little karoke. Amisha and Rahul generously offered up their apartment which served as a dressing area for me and added private space when needed. Everybody helped with the entertainment, the setting up of the food, and the clean up. True comic relief came at the end of the night when we found that both Rama's and my car had been towed! It was quite an adventure to go retrieve the cars at 2 am all decked out in my sari and jewelry. There's Boston for you! All good fun!
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| Mehendi sari and Rama's kurta and scarf was chosen by mom-she had to rush and buy all the saris, get the blouses tailored, purchase all the jewelry within 2-3 weeks. It took a lot of organization and attention to detail. |
The Arya Samaj Ceremony:
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| One of my favorite photos showing my parents' hands placing my hand into Rama's |
Rama and I decided that we wanted an Indian wedding with all of the ancient vedantic rituals but we also wanted an English translation. We had a discussion with our priestess, Gaitree Aunty from Guyana.
She sang the mantras in Samskritam and then provided us with an English translation (with a cool ya maan accent) so that we knew what we were agreeing to ( i.e. all of the cattle and gold that I was bringing with me as my dowry etc..) All jokes aside, the beauty of it is that no matter what culture it is, the vows that are made by the marrying couple to each other are always the same across the board- to be virtuous, loving, forgiving, and to stick by each other in good times and bad. Ours just came with English subtitles ( and ya maans). Our friends, Aruna's and KK's home was decorated beautifully with flowers and the living room was made to look like a mandapam thanks to Aruna, KK and the kids.
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Sitting on Dad's lap as Rama ties two knots with the
taali around my neck and Aruna ( as his sister), places
the third knot welcoming me into the family. |
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We had a small havan and a fire which did eventually get the angry smoke detector going necessitating my cousin Siddharth's fanning skills to save the day- my poor cousin spent most of the morning up on a ladder close to the thing, pacifying it with drafts of cool air. We had traditional South Indian home-style food catered through a close friend of Aruna's- Rahul and Gopal were kind enough to pick up the food for us early that morning. They also brought all the flowers for the wedding including the garlands which were made to order and shipped in from New York and needed to be picked up at Shoba Aunty's place.
We had wonderful helping hands from Uma Chithi & Chithappa, Balaji, Nikita & Sumitha, Sunny, Amisha & Tanu, Lakshmi & Sudha, Krithika, Srikanth, and Vasan.
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| Nikita,Sumita |
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| Ramani Chittapa,Uma Chitti, Shrayesh |
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From left to right, top: Srikanth,Shoba, Siddharth, Krithika,
Shanti,Vasan, Lakshmi, Sudha, Dad, Mom, Patti, me,
Rama, Amma, Appa
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Our awesome parents organized a small army of my cousins who attended (as seen above) to put together all of the goodie bags that needed to be given away later that evening. I also have to thank my cousins Srikanth, Krithika, Lakshmi, and Sudha for helping dress me up for the morning's ceremony and for helping decorate our honeymoon suite at the Hilton ( more on that later). I was so happy to see cousins who I hadn't seen in more than a decade! Weddings really do bring families together!
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| My Patti has the energy of a 16-year old! |
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| Shanti looking beautiful as ever and Siddharth sporting a goatee |
My sweet Shanti and Patti took the trouble to come all the way from India- Patti needs knee replacements on both sides. So full of life and young at heart. It was so good to have their love and support.
The photographer, Maheshwari Uncle and his utterly faithful comrade & videographer, Mr. Milton did a good job as well. After the ceremony, there was a long photo session in which we, the couple, were mercilessly subjected to till our facial muscles ached.
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| Mommy and I in an emotional embrace |
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| One of my favorite photos: Amma and I |
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Aruna, KK, Amrita, Kirtana whom we will
always be grateful to |
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My baby sister and I
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The Reception : We had time for a little nap and then had to rush over to the country club for the reception. Aruna, a few of my cousins, my friend, Naveen, who flew in from NYC, Balaji from Connecticut and Shoba went ahead of us to set up the tables. Dinner, which we catered from Dosa Temple in Ashland ( incidentally where we had our second date) needed to be brought over and set up. Once again Gopal and Rahul came to our rescue there. Everyone organized, divided, and conquered and the end result was in my opinion simple but elegant. A big thank you to all of them for being so efficient and doing such a wonderful job!
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| Rama and I saying our vows to each other |
The evening started off with a little socializing but soon it was time for the Justice of Peace ceremony. Rama and I recited our vows to each other, our friends surprised us with a cake, dinner was served and then there was a ton of music and dancing. I'll let the pictures do all the talking.
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Amisha, Saisha, Rahul,Gopal, Nazma,
Marco, Gopal Chandra |
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Glad we got a lot of people out on the dance floor
After the Wedding: We bid good bye to our incredible parents who stood by us unconditionally through all our journeys. Our cousins Srikanth, Krithika, Lakshmi, and Sudha surprised by decorating our hotel room at the Hilton- we walked in the find lovely rose petals all over the the bed, a bottle of champagne, and craziest of all a huge sack of 'appalams' under the covers, which Rama promptly began devouring! Awesome fun! Thanks so much to my crazy cousins!
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